Hypothetically Lost

Time was my enemy.
And hope.
Time crawled along our dirty floor,
Like a spoonful of molasses drips down the wall….
Sometime around three am,
Time stopped altogether,
yet eons trickled past…
I feared these were my first moments without you.
Not then.
Not ever again.
That youd be gone, either,
Crashed, or smashed,
Jumped, asleep at the,wheel.
How long would it take For them to find you…?
for someone to call me?
How fSt,were you going?
Was the other driver drunk?
How many hours did you wait before someone came?
How come you never said goodnight?
which river?for the ashes?
What if im pregnant with,your baby?

…why did I fuss so much last night?
Did I kiss you goodbye in the,dark hours of morning?
What did I say?
What about our list of possible baby names,
And the,giant cherry pie?
What about the eighty years I saw roll out before me,
The,first time I laid,eyes on you?

And it just went on and on. 
For ten plus hours.

with every passing hour
I couldnt help but cry.

Til finally I made my teary pleas to our parents, far,too early in the morning,
Of how something was amiss,
Bc you never came home or called.
And you never do that.

And j ust as they,all began to,wonder.

You texted me back.

My tears turned to tiny sobs of relief.
Thank you, God….

Thank You.

It was just a bunch of circumstance and miscommunication and you were asleep the whole time….


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